Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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