Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
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