Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Alive.
So much puke
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Randomize
