Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
