Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
