dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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