My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize