Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
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