honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
