She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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