We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
