The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
