these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
