so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
