i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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