Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
