We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
