im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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