Don't worry. I has chaperone.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Ladies don't puke and tell
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
