Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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