Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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