drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
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