Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
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