remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
