We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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