how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
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