turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Randomize
