There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
