A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
