Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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