Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
