My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
