yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
