Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
