I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Randomize
