i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
