I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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