My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
