Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
