Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
You were trust falling into bushes
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
