Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
