I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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