Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
You are a genius and a whore.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
