i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
