"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
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