I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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