Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
