Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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