Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize