I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
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