why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
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